Dudley's (New, Improved) Dungeon

< Apr 27th, 2014 > Isometrus

---------+-------- -....$...........\| \|..$.......x.....\| \|......iQ[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--\|--------- [## `i`: Dudley should be here soon. I got some great equipment to kill him with this time. `Q`: Cool, let me see!	---------+-------- -....$....x......\| \|..$.............\| \|......iQ[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--\|--------- [## `Q`: ..."Bracelet of warning?" "Bullwhip of life saving??" `i`: I'm little, okay? I can't use a lot of equipment the way it's supposed to be used.	---------+-------- -....$.....x.....\| \|..$.............\| \|......iQ[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--\|--------- [## `i`: Also, uhh...what exactly are you wearing? `Q`: ...a "helmet of holding." `i`: Your head is way too big.	---------+-------- -....$...........\| \|..$......x......\| \|......iQ[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--\|--------- [## `Q`: Whatever. Could you give me the "bracelet?" I actually can't see in here... `The xan falls into a pit!` `i`: Nah, I think I'll give it to the xan--I kind of feel sorry for it. What's the AC on a girdle of warning?	---------+-------- -....$...........\| \|..$.....Qx......\| \|......i.[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--\|--------- [@# `Q`: Really? The xan instead of me? `i`: Well, you're wearing a bag over your head, so you're pretty much a lost cause.
---------+-------- -....$...........\| \|..$.....Qx......\| \|......i.[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--\|--------- @## `The quantum mechanic reaches his arms out toward the xan, but it backs away skeptically.` `Q`: The xan is here, right? `i`: It's, uh, a little to the left. `Q`: Here, xan! I have a tripe ration for you, you bracelet-stealing little...	---------+-------- -....$...........\| \|..$.Qx...^......\| \|......i.[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--\|--------- @## `The quantum mechanic pulls the xan out of the pit. The xan falls onto the quantum mechanic!` `Q`: Ow--ow--ow--get it off--get it off--get it off-- `i`: You wanted better gear, right? It's your new Amulet of Stinging!	---------+-------- -....$...........\| \|..$.Qx...^......\| \|......i.[.......\| \|................\| \|.......b........\| -----+--@--------- ### `Q`: You're hilarious. Seriously, if you don't help me out here, I will trick you into falling on a cursed loadboulder. `i`: I'm not that small--	---------+-------- -....$.x.........\| \|..$......^......\| \|.....Qi.[.......\| \|................\| \|.......[........\| -----+--@--------- ### `Dudley throws a bronze armor over the quivering blob!` `Q`: Oh, he's here. `i`: Hey, he's pretty good at this, trapping the blob with armor so he can--	---------+-------- -....$.x[........\| \|..$......^......\| \|.....Qi.[.......\| \|................\| \|................\| -----+--@--------- ### `Dudley kicks the bronze armor! The quivering blob is punted against the wall!` `Q`: OH CRUD! `i`: BLOBBLES, NOOOOO!
---------+-------- -....$.x[........\| \|..$......^......\| \|.....Qi.[.......\| \|................\| \|................\| -----+--@--------- ### `Q`: We're not prepared for this! `i`: He'll go after Xanley next!	---------+-------- -....$.x[........\| \|..$......^......\| \|.....Qi.[.......\| \|................\| \|.......@........\| -----+--\|--------- ### `i`: I'm not ready--I need more gear! A two-handed athame! A towel of enchant weapon! ANYTHING! `Q`: Quick! Use one of those gold pieces as a shield! `i`: I'M NOT THAT SMALL!	---------+-------- -....$.x[........\| \|..$......^......\| \|.....Q..[.......\| \|......i.........\| \|.......@........\| -----+--\|--------- ### `i`: All right! I'm taking him on! `Dudley flicks his bullwhip! The bullwhip of life-saving is snatched from the imp's hand!` `i`: Well, that's disappointing.	---------+-------- -....$.x[........\| \|..$......^......\| \|.....Q..[.......\| \|......i.........\| \|.......@........\| -----+--\|--------- ### `i`: ...wield me. `Q`: What?! `i`: Use me as a weapon! It's our last chance! (Don't tell the elf.) `Q`: All right. If we don't survive this...I love you, Jenny. `i`: We're not even dating-- `Q`: LET'S DO THIS!	------------ / REST IN \ / PEACE \ / \ \| Dudley \| \| killed by a \| \|quantum mechanic\| \| \| \\|\|(\|()(\)/\(/\|\|\|/\|) `i`: Oh, of course, you get the credit. `Q`: Game point.
https://alt.org/nethack/dudley/

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5 Comments

#1	yhelothar	Sun, 27 Apr 2014 02:35:57
this is like a bad 1920s silent film. Q I shall trick thee into falling on a cursed loadboulder! i I AM NOT THAT SMALL! You know, I first mistook thee for a statue, when I regarded thy oversized head of stone Q x Ow Ow Ow! Get it off! I do say, this wretched xan stings like the dickens! i Doth pain excite thee? Wouldst thou prefer the whip of life saving?
#2	Bucky	Sun, 27 Apr 2014 15:58:02
Dudley got imp aled.
#3	Anonymous	Mon, 28 Apr 2014 03:44:42
I liked both comments. I think this comic was just really good for comment jokes.
#4	anther	Mon, 28 Apr 2014 15:46:38
E to yhelothar.
#5	grisha5	Tue, 27 Oct 2015 01:36:09
Bucky gets an E.

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