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Dudley's (New, Improved) Dungeon

< Aug 17th, 2010 >Sorceror
....----+--|-----...
.........@..........
.......--|---+---...
......{|....|...|...
.......|.G.G|...|...
.......|.G_G|...|...
..{....|..@.|...|...
-----.----------|...
....|.|....|....+...
@: "Griswald, do you take Dorina to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
You have a strange  
forbidding feeling. 
.......--@---+---...
......{|....|...|...
.......|.G.G|...|...
.......|.G_G|...|...
..{....|..@.|...|...
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G: "Excuse me, this is a private function!"

G: "Yes, clear off!"

The air crackles    
around the gnomish w
.......--|---+---...
......{|.@G.|...|...
.......|.G..|...|...
.......|.G_G|...|...
..{....|..@.|...|...
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G: "I said move it!"

G: "Do you not understand Common?"

The gnomish wizard  
points at you and cu
.......--|---+---...
......{|.G..|...|...
.......|G.@.|...|...
.......|.._.|...|...
..{....|G.@G|...|...
-----.----------|...
....|.|....|....+...
G: "Well I never!"

G: "I'm calling the guard."

G: "Aaah!"

What do you want to 
sacrifice? [EH or ?*
.......--G---+---...
......{|G...|...|...
.......|....|...|...
.......|G.@.|...|...
..{....|.@G.|...|...
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@: "How dare you!"

G: "GUAAAARD!"

G: "Eew, what's that smell?"

You have a strong   
feeling that Set is 
.......--G---+---...
......{|G...|...|...
.......|....|...|...
.......|G.@.|...|...
..{....|.@G.|...|...
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@: "My word! A unicorn?"

G: "How awful!"

Mitra accepts your  
allegiance.         
.......--G---+---...
......{|G...|...|...
.......|....|...|...
.......|G.@.|...|...
..{....|.@G.|...|...
-----.----------|...
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G: "I don't believe this!"

@: "Get out! We're in the middle of a wedding!"

G: *sob*

What do you want to 
sacrifice? [J or ?*]
.......--|---+---...
......{|GG..|...|...
.......|....|...|...
.......|G.@.|...|...
..{....|@G..|...|...
-----.----------|...
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G: "The guard is coming."

@: "Thank heavens for that!"

G: "Oh Ptah, is that ..."

Your sacrifice is   
consumed in a burst 
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......{|....|...|...
.......|G.G.|...|...
.......|G.@.|...|...
..{....|@G..|...|...
-----.----------|...
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G: "Fluffy! Griswald, you said she was locked up safely at home!"

G: "I know I locked the door. He must have broken in!"

The gnome misses.   
....................
.......--@---+---...
......{|....|...|...
.......|G.G.|...|...
.......|G.@.|...|...
..{....|@G..|...|...
-----.----------|...
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G: "You bastard!"

G: "Come now, dear, that won't help!"

@: "My child, try to stay calm! The watchman is here."

@: "What's all this then?"

You kill the gnome! 
....................
.......--|---+---...
......{|G@G.|...|...
.......|G...|...|...
.......|@.@.|...|...
..{....|.%..|...|...
-----.----------|...
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G: "Holy fuzbuckle! Dorina!"

G: "My daughter!"

G: "Barbarian!"

@: "A curse on you, heathen!"

@: "Nothing to see here."

This gnome corpse   
tastes terrible!    
.......--|---+---...
......{|GGG.|...|...
.......|@.@.|...|...
.......|.._.|...|...
..{....|.@..|...|...
-----.----------|...
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G: "Dear Ptah!"

G: "You animal!"

@: *retch*

@: "Quiet down, you lot!"

The gnomish wizard  
turns to flee!      
.......--G---+---...
......{|.GG.|...|...
.......|@.@.|...|...
.......|.@_.|...|...
..{....|....|...|...
-----.----------|...
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G: "Run for your life!"

@: "Oh my ..." *retch*

@: "You're under arrest for wasting watchman's time."

....----+--|-----...
.........G..........
.......--G---+---...
......{|..G.|...|...
.......|}@@.|...|...
.......|@._.|...|...
..{....|....|...|...
-----.----------|...
....|.|....|....+...
G: "But officer ..."

@: "You know the one law of Minetown: No drinking from the fountains!

Oh, hi, Dudley!"

@: "Hi, Frank!"

Just another uneventful day for Minetown's law enforcement.
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<August 2010>
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13 Comments

#1 Anonymous Tue, 17 Aug 2010 00:50:48
You forgot breaking and entering. That's also illegal in minetown.

#2 Sorceror Tue, 17 Aug 2010 01:34:51
#1: Only if they see you do it.

#3 jlmjlm Tue, 17 Aug 2010 02:26:17
But, if those're the only laws, then wasting watchmen's time isn't an offense after all!

#4 Bhaak Tue, 17 Aug 2010 09:49:07
I remember another comic where this has already been done, but this one also has a good execution.

#5 Slandor Tue, 17 Aug 2010 13:29:04
Poor Fluffy. :-(

Vegetables are for throwing at cats when you can't take on any more pets, so you can leave each other alone.

#6 Quint Tue, 17 Aug 2010 18:12:00
My only qualm is that when I arrive in Minetown I don't have the levels to plaster the guards.

#7 Sorceror Wed, 18 Aug 2010 00:54:19
jlmjlm: There is only one law in Minetown: do not drink from the fountains and no break— There are only two laws in Minetown: do not drink from the fountains and no breaking and entering and don't waste the watch— There are only three laws in Minetown ...

</montypythonreference>

Furthermore, was the One Ring from LotR really the only ring ever made? ONE LAW TO RULE THEM ALL!

Last edited: Wed, 18 Aug 2010 01:02:14

#8 Sorceror Wed, 18 Aug 2010 04:28:02
Oh, just noticed something: "EH" can be sacrificed in one panel, and later only "J". Fun typo!

#9 mijae Wed, 18 Aug 2010 08:36:36
I love how this comic gives new motivations to the standard gnomish wizard pointing and cursing.

#10 Quint Fri, 20 Aug 2010 21:36:12
"I do solemnly swear...that Dudley killed and ate my family!"

#11 Sorceror Sun, 22 Aug 2010 01:57:38
My favourite part is where Dudley kills and eats an innocent gnome in front of both the city guard and the priest.

#12 AndreyK Tue, 24 Mar 2015 20:48:21
Huh? What is that yellow }? Whoah, someone's... urine?

#13 sfc0 Wed, 8 Apr 2015 06:48:30
#12: It's the priest's vomit, after seeing Dudley eating the gnome.

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